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Why I’m putting Full-time Streaming on the Backburner

So here I am, sitting at the computer, watching the blinking line, waiting for words to hit the page. I’m wondering how I should start this, how I should explain to the 8BitFamily that mama has to leave full-time casting for a while. There’s no easy way to explain everything that is happening offline, when I’m not on Twitch. There’s no easy way for anyone to explain their whole offline lives, right? For me, it makes all the sense: you’ve got to sacrifice a ton of things in life in order to make things work. But my family life, the one offline, won’t be it.

Let me explain why I need to put Full-time Streaming on the Backburner, because I think you guys, the 8BitFamily, deserve to have a good explanation. You’ve been there with me for the whole ride, it would be unfair if I’d temporary leave the full-time cast without a word. The Mods, the regulars, the casters who support me as well… From those who stop by every once in a while to those who are super loyal to the stream… Thank you <3 It may be cliche but you’re the reason why I stream in the first place. But…

There’s this thing called life, y’know, the one in which when you become a responsible adult, a parent on top of it, you need to put yourself second. You need to stop being selfish. Sure, you’ve got dreams, you’ve got hopes, but you can’t drag people down with you just so you can achieve those things.

About 5 months ago, things were smooth. Everything was well: full-time streaming, husband  was working hard for our son and I, and then *poof* right when we expect it the least (who can anyways?) my husband loses his job. What the fridge?! He comes back home, waits for other people who promises jobs, promises, promises… And nothing happens. We’re losing money, but we are not losing hope. I continue to work on the stream, he works on getting a new job. I could not go out to find work because I was scheduled for surgery.

Excuse me, I’d love to work and make money but I’ll need to go on sick-leave for a month because surgery. Hire me?” Yeah – no, not going to happen.

So we wait. I have surgery. There are interviews, and then silence. Up until recently, that is. My husband got a job! *throws confetti* hurray! Things are looking up again! This job, this career, means a much better future for us, for our son. Stable work, no stress. Only two small details though; less money, and we need to move.

From the east coast to the west coast of Canada.

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We have one year to save enough money for the move. One year where my husband will work hard on the West coast while I take care of our son on the East coast. Only one problem: two rents, two everything. Less money. Way less money.

After looking for at-home work for a long time and failing to find anything, It’s a no-brainer, really. I need to put my full-time Streaming on the backburner and go back to work. This means I’ll be streaming… but when? What kind of schedule? No idea. Once, maybe twice a week? Perhaps not even a day?

Of course my dream is still to become a full-time caster, but right now, it’s not bringing any money that can allow us to pay for everything we need to take care of. My son, my family, comes first. Our future comes first. Before my dreams. It would be extremely selfish of me to continue to do this full-time stream thing and leave everything to my husband. Selfish, and irresponsible.

But you can still stream between sleep and work, Val!” Well, sure, I could, if I wanted to be the worst mother of all time. When I’m not at work, I’ll be with my son. Tons of streamers work full-time and cast for another 5 to 8+ hours. I can’t do that while raising a child. It’s my first priority! I’m sure you understand. I hope you guys understand.

This is not a Good-Bye. It’s a “see ya later!“. I will be hanging around when I can. Streaming when I can. But I can’t set a schedule. I need to dedicate my time to my son this summer, and to full-time work.

Who knows, maybe if my fairy godmother shows up, things will turn around sooner than later.

Love your faces <3

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